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NASA builds drones to destroy space debris

Jayce Briton, Off the Wall Writer
February 20, 2013
Filed under Off the Wall

Scientists reported Tuesday that the recent increase in space debris in close contact with Earth was the result of the universe existing in an arcade cabinet of the 1979 Atari video game, “Asteroids.”

“We’re shocked,” Roy Billings, an adviser to the Secure World Foundation said about the findings, “but space exploration is unpredictable.”

This finding came only days after a meteorite impact in Russia. The nation was hit by a meteorite the size of a bus, which injured more than 1,000 people.

The president has already begun talks with NASA scientists on what can be done about the threat of space debris. The recent fly-by of asteroid 2012 DA14, as well as the impact in Russia, have increased pressure to fund space programs.

A statement from the White House Press Secretary Wednesday said, “The threat of space debris is not to be taken lightly. A plan has been made to engineer a special drone to destroy any space debris posing danger to Earth.”

NASA hopes the drone, which is shaped like a pyramid, will score them high amounts of praise.

Warner Bros. is already working on a film deal based on this revelation, with a J.J. Abrams-penned script. Abrams, who gained notoriety through his work on TV series like “Felicity” and “Lost,” was recently signed on to direct the next of the “Star Wars” series films. He also directs the current “Star Trek” film series.

“It’s a great honor, being able to chronicle history in film, being trusted with that responsibility,” Abrams said. “Plus I love lens flare and I feel like this film has a lot of room for that.”

According to industry insiders, top tier directors such as Mel Gibson, Gary Busey, and M. Night Shyamalan have been approached to direct the film.